Wednesday, 20 April 2016

Suicide

It was 3p.m in the afternoon. Karthick was sitting alone in his bedroom watching his favorite actor’s movie on T.V. 

He had had enough. He was a complete loser in everything he ventured into. Despair and frustration had driven him to the limits of his endurance. 

Looking back at his life, he realized he had not always been like this. There was once a time when he had been more successful. He had been a bright student at school and college and had done very well in his first job. He had been happily married and had a loving wife and a beautiful daughter who meant the world to him. Life couldn’t have been more satisfying and fulfilling. And then, one fine day, everything he valued in his life was snatched away from him in an instant. On that fateful Friday evening, he was in a bad mood owing to a bad day at office. He, along with his wife and his 2 year old daughter were travelling to his mother’s house for a vacation. He was in the driver seat talking to his friend through mobile phone. He ignored the repeated warnings his wife had given him. As fate would have it, a momentary lack of concentration resulted in the car skidding off the road and crashing with the divider. His wife was killed instantly while he and his daughter somehow managed to survive.

After that incident, life was living hell for him. His guilt had become an all-consuming creature living within him and had managed to snuff out every bit of joy and happiness in his life. His despair had grown to huge proportions that he felt he could not live with it anymore. He could not forgive himself for his wife’s death, no matter how hard he tried. Finally, unable to bear the burden any longer, he had decided to end his own life. 

Now that he had made his decision, he felt a sense of calm descend on him. He felt much lighter and his mind was at peace at last. He sat on his bed and looked at the pills that he had bought from the chemist that evening. Those were the angels that would take him to the world beyond. He could not wait to meet his wife there. He slowly took the pills and counted them. Ten of  them. They should do the job. He fetched a glass of water and placed it next to the pills. He was ready... His wife was waiting… He had to go… He took the pills and washed them down with the glass of water. In a few moments, the room started to spin and he could not hold himself steady. Everything was dull and hazy. It was as if everything around him had turned to water and the entire world was in a stupor. Amidst the haze, he heard a loud wail somewhere close. It must be his daughter in the adjoining room. He tried to get up and console his daughter but could not move a muscle in his body. Moments passed… The crying continued, but this time a little farther…He felt darkness surround him and comfort him like his long-dead mother. The crying stopped. There was a blissful silence and a peaceful void everywhere. He was home at last.

The orphaned daughter continued crying …

The movie ended.

Karthick felt bad for the daughter.. He was thankful that he had not resorted to any such ways, though he was almost tempted at one stage after cancer had cruelly snatched his wife from him at an young age. His daughter, Sarah, was the only reason he lived on. He knew his wife would never forgive him if he left Sarah alone.

He knew, “Suicide is never an option!”  



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